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What I know about INNER GAME
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Old 12-14-2008, 11:50 PM
The Judge The Judge is offline
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Default What I know about INNER GAME

Decibel asked me to contribute something on inner game and I jumped at the opportunity. Writing out your thoughts allows you pull a thread of order from the haphazard way we think about things, and thus the simple act of writing ABOUT inner game is the foundation OF inner game.

However, the term “inner game” is a misleading anachronism from the old-school community lexicon. To me, inner games implies it parallels outer game. What you spit is outer game, what you feel WHEN you spit is inner game. There’s some truth to that, however developing inner game is not as linear and applicable as, say, learning a routine stack or executing an attraction tactic. Inner game is ambiguous, deep-seeded and elusive.

On the other hand, because inner game is so enigmatic, there’s not much turnkey advice on how to improve your inner game. Aside swooping generalizations, most instructional literature stops short of outlining a specific regiment one can practice to improve inner game.

And this is probably for the best, as everyone enters the self-development arena/pickup community with different mindsets, beliefs, issues, mental problems, limitations and social handicaps. Teaching an opinion opener is a cookie-cutter solution for anyone to start a conversation. Teaching how to correct someone’s thoughts, beliefs and feelings is not universal.

But in an attempt to mitigate this seemingly paradoxical “inner game” dilemma, I begin by acknowledging inner game is an elliptical and (sometimes) chaotic process but will suggest very specific and concrete ways to solidify your inner game.

Probably most guys reading this are guys who have some field experience. After learning the whirly-twirl flash antics of routines and tactics, guys realize the difference between a good night and a bad night isn’t the words, the moves or even the structure, but how they FELT when they interacted with the girls.

In a sentence, focusing on inner game is moving from delivering field tested material to becoming a field tested MAN. Although, field tested is not the right word: It’s more like FIELD HARDED MAN.

The community guys with tight inner game are simply the guys who go out and approach. There’s no way to learn inner game on the internet or from an e-book or by going to seminars. Nor will hypnosis and affirmations give you the type of inner game you need to attract women. The simple truth is that the hard way is the easy way: You want inner game, go out. It’s no different than bodybuilding: all the dieting, supplements, information and rest is absolutely useless if you don’t go to the gym and do the reps.

But going out is not the be all and end all. There are guys who go out constantly and still don’t develop tight inner game. And it’s those guys I’m writing for, as much as I’m writing for myself. To develop inner game, we need a roadmap. Let’s try to untangle the mystery and define inner game.

After studying naturals, community guys who are super tight, instructors, “gurus” and other socially calibrated, likable men, I’ve noticed similarities. For the sake of this article, I’m going to limit the discussion of good inner game to simply the inner game needed to pull girls. No matter what system or school of pickup you follow, female to male attraction is based on four factors:

1.) Offering value
2.) Dominant/Leading
3.) Emotionally unreactive
4.) Core confidence

*I would also add a fifth factor which is “Sexually non-judgmental/openness to sex” because I find this is crucial for pulling girls quickly, but it’s not absolutely necessary to spark attraction.

Most community guys get stuck at some point in their progress in what’s called “entertainer man” syndrome (also known as “dancing monkey” or “Ronald McDonalding”). This is when you’ve learned how to offer value and enjoy the validation and female attention you derive from it, and thus entertain the girls like a chode then go home alone to do the five-finger shuffle.

While there’s a condescending stigma attached to these “entertainer men”, I don’t think getting caught in this phase for a while is such a bad thing. You’ve effectively mastered one of the four factors needed to create attraction. That’s awesome. Ironically, from what I’ve observed, most naturals have the other three factors in place but lack the ability to selflessly offer value. (This is especially true of “ pimp assholes” who are masters of “dominant/leading” and “emotionally unreactive” but are valueless d-bags who are socially uncalibrated.)

Although, unfortunately for entertainer man, offering value alone will never get you laid. Ever. Any of the other three factors in isolation WILL occasionally produce a lay, but entertainment will only get you attention, not pussy.

Even worse for the community guy, entertainer men APPEAR to be huge pimps. No doubt you’ll blow your whole lair away if you can get that bitchy turbo HB10 giggling at your routine stack. Chodes will be amazed, forums will glorify you. Learning how to offer value is FUN because you’re learning how to make people LIKE YOU. You don’t have to step on any toes. You’re just the fun social guy, making people laugh and delivering good feelings.

But to get REAL searing attraction, to get girls, to get LAID, you have to do more. You have to be ready to step on toes, get hated on, not give a fuck, to be a MAN. Why? Because being leading/dominating, emotional unreactivity, and having core confidence are going to subject you to “uncomfortable” situations.

This is where you truly cross “field tested material” land into “field hardened man” land. So let’s devise a roadmap on how to get there. In my experience, inner game is based on:

1.) An underlining and unanimous positive belief system that supports your goal
2.) A strong body of reference experiences that support your positive belief system
3.) An unshakable sense of self and identity
4.) A complete lack of fear or inhibition of risk-taking

Of course there are the classic inner game buzzwords like “abundance mentality” and “living in one’s own reality” but I believe those mindsets are subsumed by the four factors above.

Let’s briefly examine these four factors before outlining a turnkey system to pump up your inner game.

AN UNDERLINING AND UNANIMOUS POSITIVE BELIEF SYSTEM THAT SUPPORTS YOUR GOAL

This can be broken into two categories: 1.) beliefs about oneself, 2.) beliefs about society at large. For the latter, being a KJ and literature junky is actually super helpful. Pickup and evolutionary biology literature explicitly explain in unashamed detail what’s going on biologically, socially, emotionally, and sexually when you’re attracting a woman. By “seeing the matrix”, you understand the beliefs that help you toward your end goal (and hopefully that goal is having sex with a woman you are attracted to). It’s not my job or prerogative to outline those beliefs here, but I’d recommend you read up on the subject until you have a thorough understanding of “the matrix” and you accept the beliefs that push you closer to your goals. If you’re still using words like “slut” or putting any kind of judgment on the way a woman acts, you have books to read and work to do. (More on this later.)

Beliefs about oneself are more deep-seeded and difficult to rectify, but they too have to push you closer to your goals. Any limiting belief you have about yourself MUST change. In your head, there should be absolutely no reason you can think of as to why a woman would reject you. If you have a limiting belief about your body either change it physically or accept it. Since beliefs about oneself are deep-seeded, you might need more than pickup literature and self-help advice to change your thinking. You know who you are. Get help.

A STRONG BODY OF REFERENCE EXPERIENCES THAT SUPPORT YOUR POSITIVE BELIEF SYSTEM

Reading that, most people would probably assume I mean POSITIVE reference experiences (for example, if your belief was “All girls love me” that you have to accumulate tons of reference experiences where girls love you.), however, that’s NOT the case. The reference experiences I’m referring to are simply going out with your beliefs and applying them to society at large. It doesn’t matter if people accept your beliefs or not, what matters is YOU accept your beliefs. As long as your beliefs don’t change in the face of negative (or positive) social feedback, you win.

Take a total newbie who’s never cold approached. Say you tell this guy “It’s okay to approach women you don’t know.” You keep emphasizing it and telling him until it’s tattooed in his brain. He BELIEVES it’s okay to approach women he doesn’t know, even if he hasn’t done it. When he does, the first handful of approaches might go awful. But it doesn’t matter. He find out THAT HE CAN DO IT. Period. The social feedback DOES NOT MATTER. The separating factor is that he KNOWS (despite social feedback) his belief DIDN’T CHANGE. From there, it will become a self-fulfilling prophecy as he continues to gather reference experiences. As long as he keeps believing it’s okay to approach strangers, he’ll keep doing it, and eventually his belief becomes a reality.

Too many guys fail at pickup and at developing tight inner game because they fail at this step. Boil down everything to this simple rule: “I know the right thing to do and I do it. How do I know it’s the right thing to do? Because I’m doing it.” NOTHING ELSE MATTERS. Adapt the mantra “IRRELEVENT” for anything that falls outside your belief system.

AN UNSHAKABLE SENSE OF SELF AND IDENTITY

Identity is one of the most slippery and misapplied terms in the community and something I just recently reexamined and redefined for myself (and became clearer after talking at length with my good friends The Golden Child and Pythag). The mainstream definition of identity is you are what you DO. If you ask someone to identify themselves, they might say, “I’m an accountant. I graduated from Dartmouth. I’m a brother and a son. I like exercise and the outdoors. I enjoy x, y, and z.”

But, for the purposes of this article and the way I view inner game, identity is NOT those things. Identity is what UNDERLINES the things you DO, because that is truly who you ARE. So, take for example the person who says, “I’m an accountant.” Accountant is not their identity. It’s simply a manmade label that can be taken away tomorrow. The process that MADE someone an accountant is where their identity is derived. The hard work, the dedication, the studying for CPA tests, THAT’S their identity. That’s what cannot be stripped away from someone. It makes me think of that theory that if the wealth of the world was distributed equally that it’d be in the same hands within 5 years. THAT’S identity. People who are simply given money (i.e. people who win the lottery) have the label “wealthy” but don’t have the IDENTITY to back it up. That’s why they end up squandering all the money in a very short amount of time.

Understanding your identity builds on the first two inner game factors: beliefs and reference experiences. I’ll go over specific ways to understand and build your identity later, but for now just understand the concept: You seed a belief > You water that seed with reference experiences > You grow an identity. In less metaphorical terms: You believe you’re attractive to women > You acquire reference experiences that reinforce that belief > That belief becomes a part of your identity. Your identity would exist regardless of language, society, time, whatever. If we suddenly woke up in the Stone Age, who would you be? That’s who you REALLY are under all the societal pretenses and labels.

A COMPLETE LACK OF FEAR OR INHIBITION OF RISK-TAKING

Just as the last three inner game factors built on each other, the lack of fear and being a risk-taker is an outgrowth of a strong identity (which is an outgrowth of a positive belief system reinforced by reference experiences). People with strong identities are the people who lack fear, who venture into the unknown, who take risks with little regard for their ego or the way they’re perceived by others. While this is the pinnacle of inner game and probably the ultimate goal of learning pickup, it directly relates back to first factor of attraction: value giving. To be a TRUE value giver – and not a button pushing entertainer man – one must develop themselves to this level of inner game. For most (myself definitely falling into this category), we’ve experienced this “state” during our most on nights. Whether you call it “being in the zone”, “being in state”, or my personal favorite “NIMBUS”, there are nights when an internal CLICK goes off inside and we get that glimpse of self-awareness where we don’t just know – we actually FEEL – our value and it radiates off us. In this state we’ll take the biggest risks and reap the greatest rewards. THESE ARE THE NIGHTS LEGENDS ARE MADE. For the best pick instructors, they live their lives perpetually in this state.

Again, I use the term “risk-taking” in a context specific to my view of inner game and it shouldn’t be confused with the way it’s defined by society at large. In this context, risk-taking and complete lack of fear means being completely and utterly disconnected from your ego. This is a different type of fear than fearing for your safety. “Ego fear” is an artificial fear instilled into us by society. It certainly has its place and it’s not necessarily a bad thing. It keeps things running in an orderly fashion. There can only be one boss. There’s no term for AMsOG (Alpha Males Of the Group). Fear and inhibitions put everyone in their place and set the bar for heroism high. To overcome that fear, you have to be a super tight dude. Your shit has to be in order. From there, everything flows. The four factors of attraction aren’t points you’re trying to “hit”, they’ll simply byproducts of how you live your life. Of course you’re going to offer value, dominate the group, escalate, remain unreactive and shine with core confidence. How could you not? Anything less would be artificial and not you.

With the four factors defined, let’s move on to a turnkey system for perpetually reaching this level of inner game.

TURNKEY SYSTEM FOR INNER GAME DEVELOPMENT

As we already outlined, the four factors of female to male attraction derives from the combination of the four factors of tight inner game. Furthermore, the four factors of tight inner game interlock like a set of nesting dolls (to rehash: strong beliefs backed by reference experiences gives you an iron-strong sense of identity which alleviates you from (ego) fear and unlocks your potential for social risk taking. When you’re a social risk taker you hit the four factors of female to male attraction with little thought to what you’re actually doing or saying. Attraction is simply not a choice.)

Cool.

Step 1: How to get AN UNDERLINING AND UNANIMOUS POSITIVE BELIEF SYSTEM THAT SUPPORTS YOUR GOAL

So, to begin, we have to cultivate strong beliefs. This is the “KJ stage” where your work is done away from the field. Here’s what you do:

1.) You buy a notebook
2.) You write on the front page: THOUGHTS/REFLECTIONS/EXPERIENCES
3.) You write on the last page: GOALS/BELIEFS/AFFIRMATIONS
4.) You begin writing on the last page
5.) Write PAGES on EXACTLY how you see an attractive male (keep the four factors of F2M attraction in mind). Describe EVERY detail
6.) Write your description of your IDEAL woman. Describe EVERY detail
7.) You write your goals in EXPLICIT detail
8.) You construct a belief system that will actualize your goals. WRITE OUT EVERY BELIEF NECESSARY. Keep in mind both beliefs about society AND yourself
9.) Turn your beliefs into a list of affirmations (type them out later and put them in your wallet or other place for quick reference)

If done correctly, you now have THE VISION. You’re now a man who 1.) knows what he wants, 2.) knows what he has to become to get what he wants, 3.) has a belief system in place that will actualize what he wants and who he is going to become.

* If you’re unsure what creates attraction (and you should know down to most minute detail) or have limiting beliefs about society and/or women (this step requires you be EXTREMELY honest with yourself), I’d suggest reading up on the subject as I already mentioned.

Step 1: CHECK!

Step 2: How to get A STRONG BODY OF REFERENCE EXPERIENCES THAT SUPPORT YOUR POSITIVE BELIEF SYSTEM

Here’s the hard part. Here’s the part where most men fail. Here’s the part where self-deception comes in. Here’s the part that separates the MEN getting it done from the boys who post about number closes on lair forums. Here’s the part where I’m at and probably 98 to 99 percent of other guys in the community. Here’s the part that requires you to look cold fear in the face for hours on end and not flinch.

Here’s where you must gather reference experiences to support your beliefs.

Most of you probably have already done this to some extent. Some of you have pushed your comfort zone and learned to talk to strangers, ask for phone numbers, maybe even go for quick make outs or same night pulls. That’s awesome. But I’ll bet you also have fears you’re not confronting. I know I’m guilty of this. I’ll bet you KNOW there’s something YOU KNOW YOU SHOULD BE DOING, yet the thought alone sends fear echoing through your body. You don’t need to confront this fear. You can probably get laid and never have to face it. Or maybe the local lair has deified you already, why show them you’re a mere mortal by admitting fear? Why even admit it to yourself?

BECAUSE YOU’LL NEVER ACHIEVE TRUE SUCCESS IN PICKUP IF YOU DON’T CONFRONT YOUR FEARS.

For me, I realized this fear is going out alone. For other guys, I’ve seen fear of escalation, fear of going to the SNL pull, fear of mixed sets, fear of throwing in conversational sexual spikes, fear of day approaches, fear of ruining a “nice” interaction by introducing a sexual overtone…plus a bazillion other fears I don’t need to list. I didn’t even have to write those examples. Deep down you know what your fears are. If you don’t, you’re in self-denial and should go back to step 1. If you’re honest with yourself, keep reading. Here are your steps:

1.) You write your fears in the back of your notebook
2.) You write what you think the underlining cause of this fear is (for example, in my case, my fear of going out alone is not simply I’m afraid of going out into social situations solo. Maybe it’s because I depend on other people to pump my state. Maybe it’s because I want validation from my friends. Maybe it’s because my ego depends on hanging out with “cool people” to allow me to feel cool. Maybe it’s 8 or 9 other reasons…but you get the point)
3.) HONESTLY assess each of these underlining reasons for your fear and come up with solutions you can apply EVERYDAY to remedy them (for example, if I think that my fear may be related to wanting people’s validation, I have to set a goals to STOP TALKING ABOUT MY ACCOMPLISHMENTS and pickup successes; stop checking to see if people are watching when I approach girls, etc.)
4.) Set up a regiment to confront your fear DIRECTLY. Systems include number of days/hours you will spend a week confronting your fear along with the period of time you will allot (i.e. number of weeks/months). So for example, I am going to start going out 3 times a week for 2 hours a night for 3 months to confront my fear of going out alone
5.) You stick to your system religiously and not miss a single day, hour, approach, etc.
6.) You write your experiences in the front of your notebook

As I said, this is the most difficult step in developing your inner game. This is truly where you have to do “the reps” to make it happen. This takes an incredible amount of courage, effort, and self-discipline to accomplish. The rewards are complete social freedom and sexual abundance, but, as some very wise RSD poster once wrote: You pay for it with the price of your ego. The risk/reward payoff is almost equal.

When you finish your regiment there should be no (social) fear left in your body. This is where you truly no longer give a fuck and have passed the complete indifference threshold. If there’s still fear left in your body after this, restart the process over again.

Step 2: Check! Your inner game is now dialed, tight.

And that’s it. In two steps, become the man. However, point 4 and 5 of Step 2 are probably the difficult things you will ever have to do. Survive your regiment, you will BECOME the man you wrote about in the back pages of your notebook. The blueprint of an attractive man is embedded in all of us. Armed with the body of pickup literature and your notebook, there’s no reason why you can’t be the boss lord of the universe. Unlearning the bullshit that’s been programmed into your brain is what inner game is really all about. To combat the decades of social conditioning paired with the limiting belief system of the world weighing on your psyche, only a gargantuan effort can effect a change. You already understand and accept this. I know this because you’re still reading. But now it’s your turn. As I said in the first paragraph: To make sense of your “inner game”, start by writing. Get the notebook. Fill its pages. Chisel your own fate. Be honest with yourself. Become whom your meant to be. Become a legend. Believe.

The clichéd way to end this article would be to say “good luck!” But this is beyond the realm of luck. Luck is a word invented by the weak. By people who would never read this article. People who would never have the balls to even consider what you’re going to do.

So from one man to another, I say “SUCCEED.”

At all costs, succeed. SUCCEED.

PAX.
~TJ
__________________
But that man who sets himself the task of singling out the thread of order from the tapestry will by the decision alone have taken charge of the world and it is only by such taking charge that he will effect a way to dictate the terms of his own fate.

Cormac McCarthy, Blood Meridian
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Re: What I know about INNER GAME
  #2  
Old 12-15-2008, 05:32 AM
Captain Awesome Captain Awesome is offline
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This is a fantastic article. Seriously bad ass stuff, man.

I wanna throw in a very small point, which is that when you set these tasks to face your fears, you're also usually dealing with your biggest current sticking points.

I heard Sinn say on one of his conference calls that usually what guys think is their sticking point is usually just a symptom of a much bigger one.

So for example: if you're having trouble kiss closing (which usually is due to simply not going for it), its probably a symptom of escalation anxiety. So by practicing your biggest "outer game" sticking points, you're simultaneously building your inner game, and vice versa. A lot of sticking points can be remedied simply by "going for" them. #s, kisses, make-outs, bounces, pulls. There are minor mechanics involved, but its all old news in terms of community literature, and its just up to the individual to go out and start doing it.

So this can be reverse engineered to help you analyze what your fears are in pick up, if you're having trouble beating down your ego enough to find them. Take your sticking point and find out if its simply because you're afraid of something. And if it is, start doing that thing. Like back in the day I used to not get D2s because I wasn't calling my numbers. And then I would call them but not invite them out. Hello, obvious?

Another point, that I didn't get until a few months ago, that made me start to improve much faster and in bigger leaps, and is directly related.

If you're not blowing out sets, you're not pushing yourself enough. (ie: you're not trying those things that scare you)

From maybe May to September of this year I was stuck in PUA fantasy land, as the "I don't get blown out" guy. Its entirely possible I believe to go through life with almost no blow outs, but it means you're playing it safe.

I know most people on this board have already talked about this and know not to fear the blow out, but I think it bares repeating, 'cause I know it took a while to get it into my head. You should be getting blow outs. You should still take into consideration why you got blown out, when you're debriefing/writing FRs at the end of the night, but you should accept it as part of your night. Like Brad P says: the blow out isn't the enemy. Its the 20 minute set to nowhere.

TJ, Major respect on going out so much solo. That's one on my list too. Its funny since, like you said, usually I'm approaching solo, and running sets solo. Sometimes I don't see my wings all night (which is usually a sign I'm getting/staying in set enough and not choding around). But for some reason its still scary to go out alone. I think its because it leaves you with no social safety net if you feel like you need a break or something. And I live next to a damn bar. All I have to do is walk next door (well, and put on pants, not in that order).

I know you're trying to not spend too much time on the interwebs, because it can be a real drain and distract from stuff that's important, but I hope you still manage to find time to make the occasional post like this, 'cause this was really valuable stuff, and I hope everyone on this site reads it.
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Re: What I know about INNER GAME
  #3  
Old 12-15-2008, 03:40 PM
Martyr Martyr is offline
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Excellent post.

I've noticed that guys with weak idenities also have an issue with self-respect, which translates onto the field as them not having standards for how they are treated, which caused them to be ignored, tooled, etc. So have standards, for how you are treated, for the people you want in your life, the women you want to attract, etc.

Like The Judge said, the identity is not in the name, it's the passion behind it. it's the work to get to it. If you lack it, it can be worked on, the following are some examples, but they do not necessarily apply for everyone:

Physical appearance - Go to the gym, get cool clothing
What you do - Do something you love, at least 2 hours a week (guitar, sports, traveling, photography etc.)
Where you are in life - Build a career, you are either doing something worth noting in your job or you are working to be in a position that makes what you do worth noting
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Re: What I know about INNER GAME
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Old 12-15-2008, 04:37 PM
Pythagoras Pythagoras is offline
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This post is the shit! Everyone read this article, and then read it again, and again.

I thought I'd just talk about my personal struggles with inner game for a minute.

About 2 months ago I had a really great run where I was getting positive results on a consistent basis. And then all of a sudden my results became mediocre at best. The irony is that my "game" actually felt stronger, and this was reinforced by others that I really trust telling me that I've been looking pretty solid. But even though my "game" was tighter I wasn't pushing myself enough. I was letting myself get too comfortable. The Nimbus was not flowing.

I came to the conclusion that my state has been too externally dependent, and this could only mean that my identity was weak!

I believe that Identity may be the absolute most important thing there is. A strong identity means that you no longer have to talk about being in and out of state. With identity comes core confidence, and this drives your state from within.

So how do I strengthen my identity? I struggled with this for a bit and that's when I realized that I can't strengthen it because I can't even define it.

So I started by taking out a fresh notebook and started writing down who I am, my values, etc.

Under Who am I, I wrote I am this, I am that, blah blah blah. But pretty soon I realized that the things I was writing were on the surface, and identity is much deeper than that.

While "gaming" a girl at my gym last wek, I started talking with her about how I've spent the last several years developing my social skills, how a couple years ago there was no way I would even be having this conversation with her. I talked about how I changed myself for the better by putting myself in uncomfortable situations over and over again until they became comfortable. I also talked about the process of reducing my ego. I then demonstrated my social savvy by role playing with her a conversation she needed to have with her parents, and teaching her how to communicate without ego, to be nonreactive, and avoid resistance.

While talking about this very situation with Golden, we came to realize that here is my identity. When you take away all the superficial crap, all the things I "have" and all the things I think I "am" you are left with the real me - I am a dude that gets shit done.

So I picked up my notebook, and under "Who am I" I crossed out everything written there and wrote the following:

"I am a man that gets things done. I figure out what my goals are and then I take every step necessary to reach them. I do not give up, I do not back down, and I do not settle. I strive for excellence in everything I do and I'm willing to share my experiences, my successes and my failures with others. And I am not afraid to fail. Because I know that each failure brings me one step closer to success."

I'm sure that in the upcomiing weeks I will adjust and add to the above paragraph, but I think it's a good start.

Do I understand identity yet? I'm not sure. Am I grounded in my identity - certainly not. But am I on the right path? I think so. I do know one thing - I will understand it, and I will get this part handled because underneath it all that is who I am!
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Re: What I know about INNER GAME
  #5  
Old 12-15-2008, 08:34 PM
Phred Phred is offline
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Judge...awesome stuff man

I just bought my notebook today....now the thinking and writing starts.....
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Re: What I know about INNER GAME
  #6  
Old 09-12-2009, 03:43 PM
JT JT is offline
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Bumping this...

Got my notebook last month (one of those old-school composition books used in grade school) and did the inner-game exercises from Judge's post.

This wasn't an easy assignment to do, especially being 100% honest with myself (dismissing all ego, realizing my beliefs, ackowledging my fears).


The most immediate improvement from doing this was a sense of prizeability. This happens when I screen girls for the qualities I find attractive. Is she cool? That is the question I ask myself; that is the question I answer.
This is where my game is.


If this game were a linear, it'd be easy and everyone would be doing it. It's peaks and valleys, but ultimately onwards and upwards.
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Re: What I know about INNER GAME
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Old 09-13-2009, 04:58 PM
Polo Polo is offline
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Limit or abstain from drinking or drug use. Pointless to go out and sarge and not remember the events of the night. Keeps you in a perpetual loop of repeating the same mistakes.

Thanks for the advice. Read it twice.
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Re: What I know about INNER GAME
  #8  
Old 09-14-2009, 10:52 AM
The Judge The Judge is offline
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Thanks for bumping this guys. Yeah, I wrote this a whole ago and it's funny to look back on these sorts of things and see them as benchmarks of how I changed. Conquering fear and understanding how conquering fear shapes your identity was something that really helped me a lot in my development. Some guys are ready to read stuff like this, some are not. Some may even be beyond it. Regardless, I really appreciate the feedback.

And this...

Quote:
Originally Posted by JTv1 View Post

If this game were a linear, it'd be easy and everyone would be doing it. It's peaks and valleys, but ultimately onwards and upwards.
Very well said!
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But that man who sets himself the task of singling out the thread of order from the tapestry will by the decision alone have taken charge of the world and it is only by such taking charge that he will effect a way to dictate the terms of his own fate.

Cormac McCarthy, Blood Meridian
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Book Recommendations
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Old 09-17-2009, 01:38 PM
Lucius Lucius is offline
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Judge:
This post was one of the most insightful and truthful posts I've read in a long while. It's a post that I've had to reread a few times in order to fully grasp all of the information.
I've watched David DeAngelo's Deep Inner Game CD's with Dr. Paul and learned a lot about the psychology of inner game. I'm also in the process of reading all of the books that David DeAngelo recommended about developing a stronger inner game. I can tell you from a personal experience that inner game has helped me to relate to people more easily. Now the fun really begins when you work on inner game with women.
What books would you recommend for myself and the community to read in order to develop a tighter inner game? Thanks for your help on this.

Lucius
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Re: What I know about INNER GAME
  #10  
Old 09-19-2009, 06:12 PM
The Judge The Judge is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lucius View Post
Judge:
This post was one of the most insightful and truthful posts I've read in a long while. It's a post that I've had to reread a few times in order to fully grasp all of the information.
I've watched David DeAngelo's Deep Inner Game CD's with Dr. Paul and learned a lot about the psychology of inner game. I'm also in the process of reading all of the books that David DeAngelo recommended about developing a stronger inner game. I can tell you from a personal experience that inner game has helped me to relate to people more easily. Now the fun really begins when you work on inner game with women.
What books would you recommend for myself and the community to read in order to develop a tighter inner game? Thanks for your help on this.

Lucius
What's up Lucius --

Thanks for the feedback and I'm glad you found value in this post.

David D. definitely has some great things to say about inner game. At the time I wrote this post, the biggest influences for me were:

1.) The Blueprint DVD series (RSD)
2.) Tony Robbins (especially "Awaken the Giant Within")
3.) David Shade material (everyone knows him as the "sexual method" guy, but he's got a lot of good shit to say on a man's mentality)

Also, I highly recommend reading fiction and philosophy, as well. For me, some recommendations are "Sabbath's Theater" by Philip Roth, "Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance", "The Odyssey" and "The Iliad", everything by Nietzsche and other books that explore the psychological aspects of human development.

Recently, my thoughts have evolved even further - way beyond what I was writing when I wrote this post. I will try and share what I've learned in the past months on here...

Hope to meet you at all the upcoming newbie sarges. We can discuss in more detail there
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